Halloween costumes for the cash-strapped male geek

We Misfits love Halloween. It’s up there with Darwin, Festivus, and System Administrator Appreciation Day. Like you, we spend days, weeks, and in the case of at least one redheaded member of our posse, months planning our outfits each year. But like you, we’re feeling the effects of the recent credit crunch on our wallets. No longer can we spend money dressing up like Big Daddy from the videogame Bioshock. Sure, it’s fun spending lots of time and money while simultaneously damaging our daughter psychologically for the rest of her life. In past years, we’d be all over that. But this year, cuts need to be made.

But while you’re sacrificing budget, you need not sacrifice your geek cred. I’ve come up with some cost-effective ways for you men to rock this Halloween without sacrificing any of my inner nerd. Ladies: fear not. We will have you covered soon enough.

Character name: General Zod
You Know Him From…Any and all things Superman
Costume Basics: Since we’re going with the all-time great Zod (from the movie Superman II, natch), all you need are some black pants and a V-necked garbage bag. Easy!
Average # of times you’ll have to explain who you are: Three times per hour in public. Less if you can rock the beard in a successful manner.
For the geek who…really wants to tell women to kneel before him all night.

Character name: Malcolm Reynolds
You Know Him From…the television series Firefly and subsequent film Serenity.
Costume Basics: Brown coat. Brown pants. Brown shirt. You get the idea.
Average # of times you’ll have to explain who you are: As Lionel Ritchie might say, you’ll be explaining this one all night long. Not many in this ‘verse have seen this show.
For the geek who…pretty much has a man crush on Nathan Fillion and wants to feel like him for a night, slipping into the shoes of the epitome of all that is manly and awesome. Um, not that I do, or anything. Er, moving on.

Character name: Cigarette Smoking Man
You Know Him From…The X-Files.
Costume Basics: A suit. Come on, you have to have one somewhere. If not, steal your dad’s. I am sure he has a few he hasn’t worn in a few decades. Also, obviously, a pack of cigarettes is a must. A carton wouldn’t hurt if you can snag one.
Average # of times you’ll have to explain who you are: Quite often, as the costume isn’t the most original. But if you’re wearing this costume, your focus isn’t on originality. After all, this is…
For the geek who…wants an excuse to chain smoke all night long.

Character name:
Snake Plissken
You Know Him From…John Carpenter’s Escape from New York and Escape from L.A.
Costume Basics: Exceedingly tight black tank, dusty leather jacket, eyepatch, mullet.
Average # of times you’ll have to explain who you are: Not many, as the eyepatch alone is a cultural icon.
For the geek who…wants to pretend for one glorious night that he’s one of the biggest badasses ever on Earth, not Azeroth.

Character name: John Locke
You Know Him From…the television show Lost.
Costume Basics: Khakis and a sweaty tan t-shirt. Hunting knife optional.
Average # of times you’ll have to explain who you are: If you go whole hog and shave your head, none.
For the geek who…wants to tell everyone at the party that they are all there for a reason.

Character name: Alex Rogan
You Know Him From…the classic (read: 80’s) film The Last Starfighter.
Costume Basics: Jeans, a plaid shirt, and an engagement ring.
Average # of times you’ll have to explain who you are: Just about no one will be able to place your character. And perhaps only one girl will actually get the reference, at which point you bust out the engagement ring: that girl is a KEEPER.
For the geek who…never got over the demise of arcades, and prefers "Death Blossoms" to "Awesome Blossoms."

There you have it: a perfectly good (and more importantly, cheap!) way to get your geek on this Halloween. Be sure to leave and and all wallet-friendly suggestions below!

About Ryan McGee